Mom is always laughing at me!

Mom found a picture on the internet and it made her laugh so hard she felt the need to post it here. She said it reminded her of me and Dad.

Mom said she saw this and immediately decided that Dad was the tan singing dachshund and I was the black and tan one, waiting stoically for the song to end. Even though Dad does NOT like dogs at all.
 In case you haven't figured out yet, Mom loves to laugh at me and make fun of me. This morning we went out for a walk. I have happily sniffing a very fragrant plot of grass while unbeknownst to me, two people were bicycling down the sidewalk. Now a nice Mom would have let me know about this but no, she kept mum (pun intended!). All of a sudden two bicycles flew right by me! I was so startled that I jumped straight up in the air! When I landed and my heart started beating again, I barked furiously! The response? Both Mom and the bicycle riders were laughing hysterically! How rude!
  She is still blaming me for the missing watch! All last night she kept telling me to go find the watch. This morning I was hanging out with her in the computer room. I was being very quiet as I had found a cork to chew on. But stupid me, I can't help but include her in the fun stuff, so I went and chewed in front of her. The response? She grabbed me and confiscated my cork! Bad Mom. She'll never find that watch!

It was a sad and lonely night

Last night was both sad and lonely. Dad came home briefly to give me some food but then he went away. I had no one to eat with so I just lay on the kitchen floor and felt sad. Then I heard a noise at the door. It was Mom! I was very excited to see her. She put my leash on and took me outside. Then we came inside and she brought my food into the living room so I could eat with her.  I finished my bowl of kibble in about 30 seconds. We watched tv for a while and then she brought me back outside. We went upstairs and went to bed.
    This morning I was full of both food and energy! It was very late when I ate last night! I bounced out of my crate and Mom put my collar and leash on. Then we ran downstairs and went outside.It had been very windy outside so I sniffed around to see if there were any new smells. On Sunday I had smelled something very tasty on our lawn. Mom said she thought it was the rooster from across the street who had gotten out. Nothing new, so we went back inside and Mom gave me breakfast and water.  She did NOT give me any yummy ham from the sandwiches she was making for Dad! That made me angry so when she was doing dishes, I ran across the kitchen and jumped up and bumped the back of her knees so that she would wobble. She was not pleased. Later she went into the living room and looked for the watch that I had previously eaten the band for. She found the buckle part on the floor but couldn't find the watch part! Then she blamed ME for hiding it! How rude!

The return of Minnie Mouse

Remember that Minnie Mouse sock of Mom's that I ate half of during my reign of terror? Well apparently it did not sit well in my tummy (I don't understand why cause it was so tasty!). When Dad came down this morning, he found it on the kitchen floor. On the plus side I am feeling much better now!

In danger of melting

Yesterday was the rainiest day ever! Mom insisted on dragging me out in it several times during the day. Obviously she does not comprehend how dangerous this is. I am so sweet and good natured that when it's raining I am in constant danger of melting! Plus I HATE the rain. It is wet and  worse that taking a bath!
   Yesterday morning  Mom took me to the library. I got to see all my friends. I ran in the door and there was Rita, Grace, Mary, both Dianes, Shana, Lori and Al. I got a ton of belly rubs and Mary did laps around the library with me! Plus Grace, who is awesome and knows how hungry dogs can be, brought me a biscuit! And Mary gave me some water!
  To repay Mom, when we got home I broke into a garbage bag and pulled out all the tissues and paper. You would think that after my reign of badness Mom and Dad would get me another antler, but they are clueless.

I'm not done!

I had another surprise for Mom. She was upstairs taking a nap and I was downstairs hanging out with Dad. Dad found one of Mom's socks (an oh so tasty Minnie Mouse sock) that I had found first!

He got it back, but I had already eaten the tastiest bits!

A very BAD dog!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday I was kinda mad that Mom and Dad went out without me! When they came home I had already decided that I was going to be a very BAD dog. While they were talking, I snuck over to the laundry basket and stole a sock. It was a Dad sock (generally I prefer to steal and eat Mom's socks but you have to take what you can get). Unfortunately Dad looked over and saw me. Mom took a picture of me innocently lying next to the sock. I have NO idea how it got there!

Honestly, I was minding my own business when a sock happened to fall out of the laundry basket right next to me,.

This little bit of naughtiness was not enough though. Dad was lying on the couch and he accidently knocked Mom's watch off it. He didn't even notice. I sat on the couch with Mom and Dad for a bit, biding my time. Finally, I pretended to be annoyed with the lack of attention I was getting and jumped off the couch. I casually sauntered over and picked up the watch, then trotted off down the hallway to lie down by the dining room door. So far so good! In retrospect, my one mistake was being too quiet! I lay there quietly eating the watch. It was tasty! Eventually Mom noticed that I was being VERY quiet. That is quite unusual for me. So she snuck over and I dropped part of the watch in my haste to get away. She (in a very evil move) forced me to drop the other piece by waving a spoon with peanut butter near me. What dog can resist that! I should have eaten the rest of the evidence-Dad took a photo.

Mom should learn not to leave her tasty items on the floor! I hope she buys another leather watch band cause they are yummy!

 

A Full Weekend!

Well, I have a lot to say this time! Saturday started out very well. Mom and Dad came home and asked me if I wanted to go for a ride! Who am I to turn down a ride. Especially if I get to sit in the front with Mom! She rolls the window down and holds me so that I can look out! I wondered where we were going-maybe to visit my bff Rigby or his sister Grace? We ended up at the petstore. This is great I thought as I sniffed around and perused all the toys. Eventually Mom and Dad took me into a small room in the store. There were dogs on tables with wild looks in their eyes. A man came over and petted me. That was fine. Then I saw Mom leaving and the man took my leash! Maybe they are getting rid of me I thought? But Dad didn't got anywhere. The man put me on a table, which I really didn't care for. Then the nightmare began! Suddenly I had a flashback to another time something like this had happened. It didn't end well! I stood on my hind legs to get the man's attention, but he was busy with my tail end. All of a sudden there was a buzzing and he shaved my bottom! And part of my tummy! It as horrible! He put me down and I ran back to Dad. We went back into the store and found Mom. When we went to the car, Mom gave me a biscuit and said it was from Dad for being so good. Mom was laughing cause the biscuit said "Roll-over!" Dad explained that he couldn't buy the first one cause it said "leave it!" and that seemed mean. Mom asked Dad if he thought I had learned to read!
   Today Mom came home with a Mini Mecki for me! I was very excited cause I hadn't had  toy to eat in a LONG time, plus Mom and Dad took my antler away cause it got too small. I was playing with my toy and saying hello to my Grandpere and my Grandpa (after all it is Sunday and that's when Grandpas come over!) when Mom said it was dinner time. I didn't want the Mini Mecki to get lonely so I brought it into the dining room with me. I thought he might want some food, so I brought him to the food bowl with me! Mom thought this was funny and Dad took photos!

 

I can't help the fact that I am sociable and like to have company when I eat!