My busy week of being called mean names by MOM

I have had a busy week of Mom being mean and making fun of me! (mean names highlighted for your convenience) First of all , she decided that I was a cuckoo. When she opens my crate in the morning, I come out cautiously-you never know what could be lurking outside-Mecki, Dad, other scary things. So I pop out of the crate a couple of times. First I stick my head out, then scoot back in, then I'll put my front paws out to test the waters and scoot back in. After a couple of tries where nothing has attacked me, I'll come all the way out ( or if a treat is involved, I will pop right out). Mom commented to Dad that I was like the cuckoo in a cuckoo clock and it was like 8:00 according to how many times I popped in and out. I thought that was quite rude! Patience is a virtue (except when food is involved!).
     A couple of days later, she came up with another nickname, Little Piggy. Just cause I am constantly starving (cause she won't give me more than 1 cup of food a day!!!!), is no reason to resort to name calling. She had put me in my pen in the kitchen and I had devoured my food (and in yet another rude thing to do, Mom put a bone shaped toy in my food bowl and pours the food around it, so I can't just vacuum it up, I have to push the bone around to get to food! Mom thinks this slows down my eating) and I was still starving. So when Mom left the room, I climbed out of my pen and ran into the living room. I pushed Mecki away from his bowl (he's never hungry anyway) and ate his food. Mom came out and found me and yelled at me! She put me back in my pen and refilled Mecki's bowl. Then she went to take the garbage out and I escaped again! Guess where she found me? Yup, on my third breakfast. This is why there is now a gate and two chairs surrounding my pen, plus the kitchen gate is up so that even when I escape, I cannot leave the kitchen!
     Ok, now for the meanest name of all. Mom said I looked like a very Fat Frog! But then she changed it to a Fat Toad to be more PC. Hello!!!! I am a French Bulldog! The term Frog is a very mean term for French people!!!! This just shows the extreme meanness of Mom. She called me this after watching my method of escape. Basically, I jump up and stick my front paws over the wood and hold myself up. (this is when Mom says I look like a Fat Frog. Then I kick maniacally with my back feet until I can pop over the top. See below:

 I got Mom back however. I was sitting on her lap, licking her, luring her into a false sense of security and then all of a sudden, I chomped on her chin!
      I don't feel sorry for Bastille at all! He deserves all those names! He steals all my toys (and won't share his), eats my food (and doesn't give me any of his, and even tries to take stuff out of my mouth!), and is overall quite naughty. Unlike me.